susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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