I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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