if you like me you must not know who I am
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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