You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
