I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
4 words: hood of his car
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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