I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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