you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
