just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
