i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
