My nipple is on Facebook.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
