Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Ew, did you brush them again?

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure

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  (301): I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush (703): Ew, did you brush them again? (301): Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure http://tfl.nu/kwwh
  Replies (7) Good night (670) Bad night (1351)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her

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  (603): She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her http://tfl.nu/d3n8
  Replies (32) Good night (4230) Bad night (799)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow

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  (240): ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow http://tfl.nu/mdzc
  Replies (10) Good night (2717) Bad night (719)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.

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  (251): I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa. http://tfl.nu/la3v
  Replies (26) Good night (4510) Bad night (808)
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  (716): View more from New York

  a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz

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  (716): a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz http://tfl.nu/ffgi
  Replies (39) Good night (7930) Bad night (944)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.

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  (732): He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper. http://tfl.nu/grbq
  Replies (8) Good night (4444) Bad night (991)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.

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  (225): thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm. http://tfl.nu/s8ta
  Replies (4) Good night (2048) Bad night (916)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.

  (727): View more from Florida

  MAS TEQUILA.

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  (301): FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE. (727): MAS TEQUILA. http://tfl.nu/9ggd
  Replies (3) Good night (1496) Bad night (662)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic

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  (765): My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic http://tfl.nu/h32f
  Replies (0) Good night (707) Bad night (409)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.

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  (204): NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees. http://tfl.nu/cysh
  Replies (1) Good night (612) Bad night (424)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr

  (480): View more from Arizona

  truly a win in your book

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  (602): i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr (480): truly a win in your book http://tfl.nu/95qe
  Replies (2) Good night (573) Bad night (313)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...

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  (519): sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain... http://tfl.nu/qwc4
  Replies (0) Good night (752) Bad night (369)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.

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  (570): If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too. http://tfl.nu/6z8l
  Replies (4) Good night (502) Bad night (765)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.

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  (512): I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like. http://tfl.nu/zkry
  Replies (1) Good night (313) Bad night (614)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.

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  (414): You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities. http://tfl.nu/nk4h
  Replies (2) Good night (551) Bad night (162)

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