I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.