hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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