im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Please don't give away my fajitas
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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