i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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