Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm passing your future prison.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize