omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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