I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
