Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize