Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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