Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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