he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
