do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize