Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
My ATM looks so different sober.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Randomize
