I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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