how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize
