You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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