I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
