she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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