I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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