He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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