i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Small penises have feelings too.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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