just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
