Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
