nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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