I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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