I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
