is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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