i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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