I wish I could teleport
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Acid is not a monday night drug
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
