We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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