I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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