today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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