Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I can text with my tongue
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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