More tranny stories later!
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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