Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
