So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
only if we run a train.
done.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
