I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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