member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.