she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
