um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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