...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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