You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
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I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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